


snow

by steviesbucks



Series: unholy matrimony [2]
Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV), Marvel
Genre: Crack Treated Seriously, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fucked Up, Post-Episode: s06e06 Inescapable, Snow
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-04
Updated: 2020-10-04
Packaged: 2021-03-07 19:22:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,713
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26812846
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/steviesbucks/pseuds/steviesbucks
Summary: it was so, so delightfully cold. her entire body had ended up enveloped in the blanket of white on the ground- snow, she’d learned- and id had wanted nothing more than to feel the texture of it under her feet.
Relationships: Framework Leo Fitz/Music Box Jemma Simmons
Series: unholy matrimony [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1941484
Comments: 8
Kudos: 11





	snow

**Author's Note:**

> Hey there! Part two to this odd little series; this is set a month or so after the first ficlet and these two have settled themselves into a sort of routine! I think this series is going to have five parts with maybe an extra work for any one-shots I may have in the future. I've got 4/5 parts done so hopefully I'll actually manage to finish a series for once! Hope you enjoy.  
> A huge thank you for my wonderful friends and betas [hazzarat](https://archiveofourown.org/users/hazzarat) and [showzen](https://archiveofourown.org/users/showzen) as always! Please do check their works out if you're interested <3

it was so, so delightfully  _ cold _ . her entire body had ended up enveloped in the blanket of white on the ground- snow, she’d learned- and id had wanted nothing more than to feel the texture of it under her feet. she often didn’t wear shoes and this was no exception, curling her toes into the ground. she’d walked a neat circle around the cottage and then had diverted from her path, walking winding lines out away from the house. she would occasionally turn back to the door, gesturing for leopold to come out and join her. he always shook his head, trying to convince her he wasn’t actually just standing there to watch her. 

when id was satisfied with her work, she decided that it was time to get more hands on. despite it probably being one of her less.. well thought out ideas, she dove into the snow, burying herself under it. the cold wasn’t the same type of uncomfortable pain she felt while trying to deal with all of jemma’s emotions in the music box- she felt comfortable and safe. she pushed her head up so she could look at the doctor leaning against the doorframe. 

_ “aren’t you going to come out? it’s nice! come outside! please? come feel it!”  _ she begged, rolling over onto her back and grinning. 

“absolutely not. it’s bloody freezing and i’m not rolling around in the snow like some mutt,” he replied, though there was no heat in his voice when he said it. 

she wasn’t really sure why he didn’t want to join her- this was delightful. snow was absolutely one of the best things she’d seen in her few months outside of the music box. she’d liked the rain and acclimatised to the warmth of inside- now that she was sleeping regularly, she wasn’t quite so sensitive to being tired. they’d gotten into a nice routine- leopold would make trips out to get things they might need and she would stay home. being exposed to too many new things at once would overwhelm her. id would often cry or lash out if she was overwhelmed; not great if they were trying to keep a low profile. she shook her head, trying to physically will the thought away so as to not ruin this great experience. 

_ “live a little, leopold- please? it’s not that cold!” _

“i’m fine, you just- have fun yourself.” the corner of his mouth turned up in a little smile, a rare occurrence.

she clambered up, snow clinging to her hair and wetting the skirt she was wearing. id had realised very quickly that she didn’t like wearing pants, opting to wear dresses and skirts even when it was cold and snowing. the cold didn’t bother her, after all, so why not just wear what made her feel comfortable? idris waded through the snow, trying not to stumble and fall, ending up in front of leopold. she grabbed his hand and he pulled away, squeezing it shut. 

“you are  _ freezing _ , my god. you’re not cold at all?” 

“i told you, it doesn’t bother me- why do you care so much, anyways?” she was teasing him, crossing her arms over her chest. he seemed to take offence to it, scoffing and shaking his head. “i  _ don’t _ care, i just want you to stop putting your freezing hands on me.” 

“you weren’t meant to answer that.” id felt a sting of something in her chest and she huffed, turning back towards the expanse of snow that covered the house and the hills around it. it didn’t seem quite so inviting now. 

“you asked me a question and i answered! what’s so wrong with that? honestly, you women-“ leopold didn’t finish his sentence. 

“you just said you didn’t care about me!” 

idris herself didn’t even realise that was the issue until she said it aloud- that little sting was.. disappointment, she realised. huh. that wasn’t something she’d dealt with before, just something jemma had pushed upon her to try and hold. 

“i  _ never _ said that, you’re just twisting my words!” the doctor retorted, grabbing idris’ arm. it reminded her of that night when she’d fallen asleep curled up in his arms, safe and grounded by the fingers wrapped tightly around her. she yanked her arm away. 

“you said ‘i don’t care’, clear as day! you don’t care about me!” id took a step into the snow, not wanting to give him the chance to grab her and yank her around. 

“i don’t- stop it, id, you know this is complicated.” 

“it wasn’t complicated when you put your-“ 

“that’s _ disgusting _ . stop it, stop being so difficult.” whatever warmth was in leopold’s voice before, it was gone, replaced with a cold bitterness. she wasn’t scared, though. he wouldn’t hurt her. 

“do you care about me?” it was an easy question. id still wasn’t sure she wanted to know what he would say, though. 

“i told you, it’s complicated. i don’t feel things the same way everybody else does, just the same way you don’t. i’m not meant to  _ feel  _ that.” 

that was it, then. she took a few more steps into the snow again and then took off running as best she could. the sharp disappointment had dulled into something deeper, something that wrapped itself around her lungs and heart, squeezing tight. she felt like she couldn’t breathe, all she could do was keep running and running until she couldn’t see the house, couldn’t  _ feel _ the stab of rejection. 

when id felt like she’d got far enough away, she fell into the snow, trying to cover herself as best she could. the cold feeling didn’t feel quite so comforting this time, a little part of her craving the warmth of being back at the cottage. he was right; she wasn’t designed to feel like she cared, to feel any sort of happiness. she was a vessel for somebody else's problems, that was her  _ job _ , why she existed at all. that was enough.

wasn’t it? 

-

even in the dark, idris made her way home with ease. she could see very well in the dark- it had taken her a while longer, sure, but maybe she could sneak her way into the cottage without alerting leopold. as much as she hated to admit it, she was getting  _ bored _ and probably needed to eat something. when she reached the little house, the curtains were pulled closed. she tried the handle; thank god he rarely locked the door. idris stepped in, catching sight of herself in the mirror. her clothes were soaked, as was her hair and her skin was pale as paper. her lips were blue- she grinned, closing the door behind her. 

_ “idris?!”  _ _   
_ _   
_ shit. leopold. id winced a little, looking at the stairs he was now storming down. the little prickles of rejection returned and she started to think of ways she could avoid the inevitable conversation. despite learning more about the world around her, emotions weren’t her strong point; she often felt them too strongly or barely at all. 

when he was at the bottom of the stairs, he reached out and grabbed her arm like he had earlier that day. she didn’t pull away this time, standing her ground. 

_ “i went looking for you- where the hell did you go? somebody could’ve caught you- they could’ve hurt you, taken you, done something worse-”  _ he sounded worried, turning her this way and that as if checking her over. 

she barked out a laugh, narrowing her eyes at him. “you don’t care,  _ doctor _ , you made that clear.”    
  
“can you just bloody stop it? i’m trying to make sure you’re okay!” the doctor spat, bringing one hand up to her face. she knew she was freezing. he didn’t let go. 

id was feeling the beginnings of anger spark. if he cared so much, why would he say what he did? she pulled her arm out of his grasp and ragged her head away, no matter how much she’d miss the warmth. “you can stop pretending now. you’re not a very good liar.” with leopold standing in front of her, there wasn’t really anywhere she could go so she stood near the door, silently demanding he move out of the way. 

“if you’d be quiet and listen for a moment, maybe i could explain myself.”    
  
“i don’t care! just let me-”    
  
“i wasn’t made to care about anything beyond ophelia and protecting the framework. i didn’t know what it was like to care about anything other than them,” the doctor explained. his hand came to rest on her jaw again, lightly this time. his thumb stroked across the skin of her neck; it felt like his skin was on fire. “my job wasn’t to be kind and cuddly, not like  _ fitz. _ unlike him, my job wasn’t to be weak, you know that. at first i didn’t care about anything more than making sure everybody knew they couldn’t ruin that world for me and ophelia. i didn’t care about anything. i wasn’t  _ designed _ to care about anything- i do care, though. about you, anyways. everybody else can go to hell for all i care. if you want me to be honest, id, i don’t know what that means. it’s the first time in my life i’ve not been sure. uncertainty is a weakness, after all.” 

id wasn’t really sure what to say. she felt.. warm. not the same type of warmth that first night they’d put the heater on and she’d curled up on the sofa with him- this felt deeper. she could sense he wasn’t finished, though, so she nodded at him to continue, leaning into the hand on her jaw a little. 

“even if i’m not sure about… whatever this is that i feel, i am sure i care about  _ you _ , id. i didn’t mean to make you run away.”    
  
“you assumed i ran away because of you?” she teased, her hand coming to rest on his arm. his mouth turned up again and as he leaned in, she didn’t pull away. the kiss just landed on the corner of her mouth; they’d done much more than a barely there kiss but it made her feel tingly from her head to her toes nonetheless. she could get used to this. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! I hope you liked it. Feel free to leave kudos and a comment or to message me/send me an ask at docjemsimmons on tumblr! Have a great day <3


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